Highschool 25

25. Lurking
I have this lurking suspicion that everything I know in my life is not what it seems. That everything I have ever known, and lived by, and been taught aren't things that matter in the slightest. That when it comes to the real world I am completely unprepared. This suspicion keeps growing and soon I'll know it to be the truth. No one has told me how it's like to really live. That highschool is the lie we've been taught to live by and that if you've bought into that lie you'll fall straight on your ass... but have I bought into it? Will I thrive past these school walls I've grown so accostomed to since I was young?
<center>I'm scared.</center>
I'm terrified, and I'm told it's normal but how come it seems like I'm the only one scared? The only one worried? Am I the only one who feels this lurking sense of catastrophe that this is all just a deadly facade? Am I the only one? Should I let people know or is this one of those life lessons you have to learn and deal with on your own? Because I think I may be too scared to do it on my own. . . and I want the friends I know I won't have next year to hold my hand through it and let me know I'm not alone... because even though I know I'm not it still feels like I am. And now that lurking suspicion is a known fact and I feel like I'm alone and all of that feels like the fact.
<center>...Will I fail at what life really is?</center>